Change isn't always so bad

I'm feeling inspired tonight. Actually, lately I've been feeling inspired. Life is not perfect, by any means, but I am very happy. A few years ago, this was not the case. I was stuck in a rut and I didn't know how to get out of it. I knew something wasn't right. I always had this sinking feeling that I just couldn't pinpoint. I was very lost.

I have changed a lot in the past two years. I eat beef, tuna fish, I can swallow a multi vitamin (although I do miss the delicious fruity chewable), and I am living the life I've always wanted, and being the person I've always wanted to be. Yet, at the same time, I am not much different at all. I still twirl my hair just as much, if not more, I still wear vanilla scented perfume, pink is still my favorite color, I am overly organized, and I still love with my whole heart.

I have made mistakes and I have hurt people who I cared about. I have been hurt, too, by those people. And one day, after a long time of denying those feelings, I finally said enough is enough. I needed to change the course of my life. I knew that the future I was allowing others to make for me, was not the future I wanted. I was terrified of the change that I knew I needed. Every day I would wake up feeling anxious because I knew it was time. Growth and change are an inevitable part of life.  It happens to everyone as they grow up. I figured out who I was and what I wanted out of life. I realized that the people I have surrounded myself with didn't see things the way I did anymore. Or maybe I didn't see things the way they did they anymore. So, after a long time coming, I said goodbye to things that weren't moving me forward. I moved on.

Moving on from everything I ever knew was one of the most difficult things I've ever done, but I knew I made the right decisions. I felt more at peace than I ever had, and I had wonderful things to look forward to. I am living my life with best friend and a beautiful little girl who makes me laugh everyday. I have my found my place in this world and it is a truly wonderful feeling.